Star Wars for the First Time: Kind of...

Have you ever watched Star Wars (Episode IV, if I must clarify) with someone who has never seen it before? I don't mean with your eight year-old, though I am sure that holds its own special significance. I mean with a mature, intelligent viewer?

Certainly, the first question that comes to mind is "What semi-intelligent human being has never seen Star Wars?" I never really thought that I would have to ask that question myself. The film and its offspring are so pervasive today, and since it was available on home video 20 years ago for that matter, that I am just flabbergasted at the thought that there are actually a decent number of people that have missed out on the experience. But despite that, I lived with a guy last year that had not seen it. I lived with him for 8 months and somehow we didn't sit down and watch it (that may be because we spent the time watching the entire run of Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman and almost ever Nicholas Cage movie ever made).

Ok, so one guy hasn't seen it. Oh well. This year I have come to a new school and have a new group of classmates, all of them very intelligent. One young lady has seen every episode of Friends and can't have a movie conversation without bringing up Hook, but she has never seen Star Wars (or The Goonies!!!). It became my mission to change this. When the film came up in class one day, I jumped at the opportunity. I just threw out the unsolicited observation that ______ _______ had never seen Star Wars. After the prof recovered from shock; he declared such gross ignorance "Just plain un-American!" So then my mission became his and he set up a screening for the class.

Unfortunately, only four people showed up for said screening, but at least ______ _______ was among them. I made a big stink out of watching the theatrical editions, which I consider superior to the updates, so I provided the film and the prof supplied snack food. After _______ _______ prepared herself by collecting about a dozen mini-Snickers, we were on our way.

I had never watched the film with such attention to what someone else might think of it. I just kept thinking to myself "What if she doesn't like it?" It wouldn't change the fact that I think the film one of the most important productions and well handled stories in film, but it may just slightly tarnish that myth (if it is so) that "Everyone like Star Wars." This would kind of ruin the magic a bit, to have someone you know really well not be caught in the same allure. Could you imagine, all of the built up excitement you have while you watch the film with your kids for the first time only to have them turn around and say "Meh"?

I had never watched the first 2o minutes with such intensity. The droids are landing in the desert, and then just rolling around in the desert, and then rolling in the dessert in a big transport. Oh no, is she going to be thrown out of this already? At the same time, I am realizing that the droids are much more than the humor roles they are often made out to be (even by Lucas in the prequels, in large part). First off, they are a decoy. Not for the Empire and their quest to squash the Rebellion, but for the audience. Their importance is thrust forward early and often, making it seem as though R2-D2 is the boon, or object of the hero's quest in the story, even before we meet said hero. When we do meet the hero, the role of the droids quickly changes. Now R2, because of his message from Princess Leia and association to and locating of Obi-Wan Kenobi, becomes the source of the "Call to Adventure" for Luke Skywalker. And just then that role is expanded even further. If the events do not unfold in just the way we witness them, or R2 if the droids are destroyed, or if R2 is not as stubborn as he is, then our hero does not recieve his call. Fate, in the form of these two droids, makes Luke's journey a possibility. Their role certainly doesn't end there. In fact, the droids save our adventurers from their most helpless moment, when they are trapped in the trash compactor.

It is sometimes easy to forget the Seven Samurai mentality that went into designing the heroes of the film (in fact, there are actually seven of them). This is mostly because the central heroes, in this case Luke, Obi-Wan, and Han Solo, are so darn cool. But the journey could not have been completed without the strength of Chewbacca, the headstrong ingenuity of Leia, and the efforts of the two droids. It is difficult to keep that in mind, even though we have seen this film dozens of times. I noticed a lot of little things watching it this way. Most of them are aesthetic patterns and thematic niches that are subjectively interpreted, but no less interesting. A pretty big one that I never caught before is Han's line just before the attack on the Death Star is launched. He tells Chewie, after one of the Wookie's inperciptible growls, "I know what I'm doing." What does he mean here? I know I am going to get rich and pay off Jabba so he doesn't send more bounty hunters after me? I know I am going to help with the attack despite my claims otherwise? I know that my fly is undone?

Despite my concerns, _________ ______ liked the film a lot. Her only comment other wise had to do with the lack of emotion that the characters show when they experience great loss. Leia loses her whole planet. but a few hours later doesn't seem to be too effected, Luke is ready to go pretty quickly after the loss of his aunt and uncle. Those of us that have seen The Empire Strikes Back, and she isn't one of them, know that most of the emotion of the trilogy rests in that film. I think it is fair to say that these emotions, though inaudible in this film, seep into that one and are easily identifiable. This film is all about the moment. Look how quickly Luke goes from a farm boy to Jedi in training to war hero!!

All in all, it was a great experience to watch the film with a trilogy-virgin(?). We were able to discuss a number of elements of the film after the viewing, and being new and unaware of the follow-ups she had some interesting insights. We also discovered, through self-disclosure, that the night that our prof saw Star Wars for the first time was also the night he became a man....



Yea, it was quite awkward.

Game Mapping: TMNT 3

Thunder cracks and irritates the lying sand. Fire presses forward against the foaming waves. A battle to save the world has just begun. While this may sound like the first hours of the D-Day invasion of World War II, it is actually the interruption of the comfortable vacation of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles in their third console outing called The Manhattan Project released for the Nintendo Entertainment System in 1992.

When the predecessor to this game came out several years earlier it was a massive success. So much so that Konami felt that they could release a game with nearly the exact same engine and a few facelifts and meet with the same amount of success. And they were right. Manhattan Project was a well reviewed title that is looked back on fondly even today. The reason that it was able to stand apart from its predecessor is the addition of “special attacks” for each character, which had become somewhat of a requirement for side-scrolling beat’em-ups.

























It is these moves, in conjunction with other distinctive characteristics that separate one turtle from the other, that I chose to map out. These are the obvious traits to analyze in a game that does not contain very many gameplay choices outside of choosing which character to use. Anytime a player engages in a game where these choices need to be made, they begin to do this subconsciously. They learn which characters would work best depending on their successes and failures in given situations. What I have chosen to do is provide a visual representation of this process.























I chose to use the Performance Chart (below) to represent the turtle’s attributes because it is a convenient way of comparing all of the turtles and their usefulness. By seeing where a given attribute lands on my chart for a certain turtle can give a player a good idea which character to choose for a given situation. This chart is more helpful in this game than the previous one because when you die you are able to switch turtles if you wish and respawn without losing progress. This would be very helpful in the second stage, which takes place on a submarine and provides many dangerous traps in the surrounding environment. This means that the “safe space” in the environment is limited, as well as the quicker combat pace. If the player dies using a slow character like Donatello or a lunging attacker like Raphael in this stage they would be better served to switch to a quick player like Michelangelo or a rounded character like Leonardo. By moving faster they are able avoid the spaces that are dangerous and not leave themselves open for attack. With this chart, the player can make the wise decision the first time rather than having to first make mistakes to learn which characters to use.

























The other map I chose was the Cartesian Coordinates Representation. I chose this because it serves as another way of quantifying the attributes of each individual in a group. Rather than being somewhat informal in the Performance Chart, the Cartesian Coordinates actually provides the player with an arranged representation. What the player can decide from using this chart is whether they need a balanced brawler or a turtle that is exceptional at one skill or another. By presenting the kind of attacks that each character is strong with, I am providing the player with a representation of how each character impacts the space that he is placed in. For example, Donatello is very strong at hitting enemies that are far away from him but is not effective when enemies occupy the space very near to him.

























I feel that both maps succeed in simplifying the process of character selection. I think that this would be a positive process for many modern game reviewers and walkthrough makers to develop for the complex games and characters that are popular today. By giving a visual representation of how each character impacts the space and time in which he or she occupies, the player can make a more informed choice. If nothing else, the reviewer would save a lot of time by substituting charts like these for a few of the pages and pages they use to breakdown the same process. It would also save the player time because he or she would only have to put a few charts on his lap to make gameplay decisions rather than paying $20 for a book that plays the game for them; completely eliminating the creative process that each gamer seeks from an interactive space and time that a game provides.
Limitations that my maps have is that they are not nearly detailed enough to address each of the plethora of environments and enemies that inhabit the game. There are many types of enemies in this game, compared with the very few variations in the previous game. They have different types of skills and weapons that impact the space around the player differently. Some of them actually interact with the environment in order to attack the player, like Foot Soldiers that splash sand into the turtle’s face, causing the event time to pause momentarily as the turtle wipes his eyes clean. To analyze this, each enemy would have to be addressed in charts similar to the ones created for the turtles.
The most difficult part of representing a dynamic environment like that found in videogames in a static format like these charts is the massive amount of factors that go into each and every round of play. Even in a game that provides the same enemies and the same environmental traps every time it is played, I still find that I cannot walk through a step ahead of the opposition. Most of the difficulty results from the massive amount of space that opposing forces occupy. There are many enemies that can attack at the same time in addition to the many environmental dangers that can make the event team seem to run much faster because of the frantic pace of the play time. There is no way to map out how time is used in the game because of all of these factors that can make one play very different than the next. In addition, these are factors that can change drastically from one player to the next, unlike the attributes that maintain their value no matter the player.

Star Trek Fan Folklore: Boldly Growing

I. Introduction

“There were so many people out there, yelling and screaming. I just froze and couldn’t move for several minutes,” (Shatner, 1994, 45). Anything shocking enough to render William Shatner, the Star Trek star and infamous egomaniac, completely speechless is an accomplishment indeed. The amazing feat referenced here is the first Star Trek convention that Shatner attended, early in the 1970’s. He was unprepared for the number of fans that appear for these conventions and the emotion and dedication that they have for Star Trek. 30 years later, no cast or crewmember that joins a Star Trek production goes in without being warned. However, this doesn’t prevent the awe of seeing it for the first time. The Star Trek fans are many and they are loyal. So loyal in fact, that the Star Trek that they got on television and movie screens was never enough for them. They have expanded the Star Trek universe faster and with more diversity than any writer or director could. In this, Star Trek fans stand alone. They are fans devoted to a popular culture creation, yet they show many traits of a folk group. As my brother found out while attending a convention, the line is never so easily drawn.

II. Discussion of the Interview

I realized early on that finding a subject for this project would be tricky. Unlike many summer students, I don’t live nearby. So I devised a strategy which would allow me to take care of two responsibilities at once. I would go home for a weekend and see the family, as well as interview one of them for the project. After talking with each family member briefly I decided that Ryan, my younger brother, may have a unique story to tell. He had attended a large Star Trek convention in Baltimore last summer and I thought that he would have some interesting insights into those fans as a folk group. So it was all set. I would come home on the weekend of June 12-14. My cousin and her new husband would also be there, so I was able to visit with even more family than I had anticipated while completing the project.

I made sure everyone knew that I had to get a project done with Ryan at some point so that we could come up with a time. It was decided that my parents would take the newlyweds on a trip to Williamsburg, about 30 minutes from our home in Yorktown, Virginia. This would give us a few hours to work without interruption. It didn’t occur to me until we were getting ready to go that I was about to record a folklore project with one of the youngest members of my family. But, as a 17 year old high school student, Ryan is definitely one of the more open and honest people in the family when it comes to sharing stories.

Having Ryan as an informant doesn’t come without difficulties. While I was flipping through my notes preparing final questions, no more than two minutes from the start of recording, he is falling asleep on the couch. I know that active youngsters need their rest, but I was getting frustrated at his attitude. So, as good brother would do, I threw stuff at him. He doesn’t get the nickname of “Rhino” for nothing, and I was probably lucky he didn’t react by charging at me. But once he was awake, he really buckled down. He prepared his own notes and had a good idea of what he wanted to get across. And it came through for the most part. However, when I would divert off of the framework we set and ask further questions about one of his observations, he would get pretty frustrated with me, as evidenced by the scowls I got during the silences on the recordings. But even then he recovered pretty well and I had a solid half-hour recording to work with.

III. Interview Content

The direction I wanted to go with this project was to get a feeling from Ryan that he observed a real folk group in action. Even if one of their common bonds originated as a popular culture television series, the fans of Star Trek have taken on a clear folk identity. This came through very clearly in the interview. When I would ask a question regarding some of the aspects that a folk group would possess he had examples of them readily available. I found it fascinating that he could identify them so quickly. He has not been associated with Star Trek fandom for a long period of time, and he has only been to one convention to date. Yet all of these group features were apparent to him. It is clear that the fans at the conventions share many cultural practices specific to them and are, in many cases, extremely organized. For example, there are several nationwide community service organizations that are inspired by and run completely by Star Trek fans. They come to almost all of the conventions to recruit new members into their organization. This evidence all points to these fans as a high context group.

The other aspect that I was interested in teasing out of him was comparing these conventions with traditional festivals. There are a lot of ways to position just about any population as a folk group, but to argue that Star Trek fans have built their own traditions through public display events like most acknowledged folk groups is more challenging. I don’t think that he was clear on exactly what the functions of a festival was at first, as far as folklore is concerned. But we came across some comparisons with other festivals to elucidate the festival experience at the conventions. After awhile he did think of a number of ways in which a convention could be a festival. These included the clothing that was worn, the common music and drama, arts and crafts, and other types of performance. For example, needlepoint is extremely popular among Star Trek fans and many bring them to the conventions to show them off or to sell them. There are also performances unique to these conventions, including William Shakespeare’s Hamlet being performed completely in Klingon, a fictional language that began development in the Star Trek universe and has continued to evolve amongst the fans.

IV. Analysis

A. Context of Collection

The collection went almost entirely as planned and came out well. I am fortunate to have a family that was willing to form their schedule around my academic duty and give Ryan and me plenty of time to work on the recording. I was also fortunate that there was a room in the house suited to this activity. The heating and air doesn’t run into it to create noise, the floor is carpeted, most of the furniture is padded, it was very small, and there are even drapes. It was extremely hot, but the final result sounded great.

B. Performance Analysis

I was very impressed with Ryan’s composure during the whole recording. He usually becomes very flustered in a pressure situation like public speaking and recordings (that is unless he is portraying the school mascot, but that is another story), but he remained calm even in the face of unexpected questions. I think I helped him stay cool with some old coaching strategies. First, I positioned our folks as the enemy rather than the recording equipment. I kept telling him we needed to have a good run because they would be coming home soon and we wouldn’t get to finish until tomorrow. Then I insisted that the recording would just be for practice and that we could do the final later. Even though those assurances seem to overlap a bit, it worked for him and we captured a good interview. The only real noticeable gesture that he unconsciously relies on is hand movement. Often it doesn’t correlate with any of the story elements, it just accompanies the verbal. My dad and I have the same gestures. A funny texture facet that Ryan leans on is voice projection. Side by side, Ryan and I have very similar voice patterns. But when we listened to the recording we noticed his voice was much lower. He admitted that he tries to do this when he speaks to unfamiliar people to portray authority and size. He did not intend to use it on the recording, but it kicked in nonetheless. I think, in the back of his mind, he thought that it would help legitimize him as a source.

C. Situating the Collection within the Body of Folklore Scholarship

Even though I obtained the information I sought during the interview, I still found myself in a dilemma. Are Star Trek fans, fans of a television series, a folk group? Because it is difficult to label them under the strictest definitions, I turned to the available research on the topic.

Star Trek fans are a unique group. Not only were they the first worldwide folk group to spawn from a fictional popular culture creation, but they are also one of the most studied fan groups in current academia. But a problem arises when discussing fans of a popular culture creation like a television series. With many definitions of folklore, popular culture creations are seen as an entity that lives outside of folk traditions and transmits their stories and performances through various, non-interpersonal mediums. However, some folklorists are not satisfied with this restriction. Elizabeth Bird believes that the mode of transmission should not be taken in to account. She says,

We need to forget about whether or not popular culture "transmits" folklore. Rather, we begin to consider that certain popular culture forms succeed because they act like folklore. To some extent they may have replaced folk narratives, but not with something completely new. Thus popular culture is popular because of its resonance, its appeal to an audience's existing set of story conventions, (Bird, 1996, NP).

This definition certainly helps to label Star Trek fans as a folk group, because they are simply reflecting on and reveling in the set of folklore that they have been exposed to. Like The Day of the Dead in Mexico or an Appalachian Heritage Festival, people gather to share and collect stories that relate to a similar set of values or way of life. The only difference is that Star Trek fans found this similarity on the television screen. But academia’s interest in fan culture doesn’t stop there. Bird also points out the role of fans participating in the development of popular culture artifacts. She claims, “If audience members are seen as active in helping to shape the way popular culture is created, they become much more comparable with folk 'audiences,’” (Bird, 1996).

A development that allows Star Trek fans to appear as a folk group is the development of their own unique slang. Linguist Patricia Byrd wrote an article about this topic in 1978. The year is important because this was almost ten years after the series had been canceled, but before it was revived as a motion picture in 1979. At that point in time, Star Trek’s only mediated existence was on television re-runs. But Byrd says that, “The real life of ‘Star Trek,’ however, is in the activities of its fans,” (1978, 52). This leads perfectly into Bird’s conception of the popular culture fan evolving into a folk group. Byrd analyzed many fan publications with the sole purpose of reading the letters to the editor and collecting the types of slang that was used in the conversations.

Even though this article over 30 years old, Ryan found many of the terms and the activities attached to them to be still in use today. In the interview, the term “filking” comes up. Ryan describes the activity as he observed it at the convention as, “rhythmical songs that talk about futuristic cultures...based on fantasy and sci-fi,” (Olson, 2009, NP). Through Byrd’s research, she defines the term: “Filk song: The name ‘filk’ song was originally a typographical misspelling of the word ‘folk’ song. It now means those songs known to frequent cons, conclaves, or gatherings of fans. Most folk songs are well-known melodies with rewritten lyrics,” (Byrd, 1978, 57). I think the irony of the folk/filk typo is quite humorous considering the development and now interstitial state of Star Trek fans as group. They display all of the elements of a folk group, but are held back from being labeled as such due to the nature of the bond that originally tied them. Filking is also of interest due to the group that has become particularly interested in that practice. They go to the conventions to display their new and old folk songs, like a storyteller may go to a festival to share his or her stories with the attendees. There are some filk song writers who have been so successful over the years that they have attained a state of near reverence by convention attendees and fellow filkers alike.

There are many fans that feel that Star Trek has become, what Ryan called, “20^th century mythology,” (Olson, 2009, NP). In the book Star Trek on Sacred Ground: Explorations of Star Trek, Religion, and American Culture, Michael Jindra suggests that “for many people, Star Trek takes the place of previous metanarratives and mythologies, such as nationalism or Christianity, that have allowed people to make sense of their identity and place in history,” (Jindra, 1999, 218). He goes on to mention that, through this supplanting, Star Trek used many of the dominant symbols and themes of Western society. This use of previously popular material, as Bird suggests, is what allows Star Trek to maintain such a firm grasp on the imaginations and interest on its fans.

D. Identification of Folklore Genre, Functions, and Meaning

Ryan’s personal narrative about his visit to Shore Leave 30 (the formal name of the convention) touched on many enlightening aspects of the folk culture of Star Trek fans and opened the door for some important questions to be asked. But something that was never in question, in Ryan’s mind, is the function of Star Trek conventions. He described the time in the convention as “an outlet for them (fans) to display their feelings. They don’t have to be worried about being judged in that very open environment,” (Olson, 2009, NP). I don’t think there is a better testament to the function of escaping social repressions.

In another example to elucidate his explanation he says, “If I walk down the street in my Starfleet uniform I would be ridiculed and laughed at, but if I wear a football jersey, no one’s going to say anything. It’s commonplace,” (Olson, 2009, NP). I think this is a great example, and it is actually a very common one among fans of many genres who like to dress up. For fans who want to be very excited about their object of affection, the acceptable space is determined by that affection. For whatever reason, fans of a fictional series are largely relegated to weekend events whereas sports fans are allowed to roam free sans ridicule. Most importantly, the fans have made the best of this folk law, and have developed their own culture within the convention walls. In that “time out of time” they display a side of themselves that is, for the most part, unseen in day-to-day life. This is identical to the attitudes toward festivals, a material genre in folklore, in many cultures.

There is an interesting turn when it comes to the meaning of the narrative. The fans that Ryan is describing are going through all of the effort and time that it takes to have a successful to, in large part, engage in activities with people that have similar interests. While I had a responsibility to complete this recording, I probably could have found anyone to talk about some story. But that isn’t what I wanted to do. Events came together to allow my brother and I a few hours to work on a project together. We are both Star Trek fans, but the topic was just the result of our time working on it. It was that we had that time that was really important. I did not realize until very recently, and I am sure Ryan has yet to realize, that the opportunities we have to do any kind of activity together are going to become very rare soon. I am moving farther away from home for graduate school and in only one more year he will be graduating high school, moving off to college somewhere, and will meet with lots of new responsibilities. As much as he and I would hate to admit it, for most of our lives we have shared many more experiences together than we have had while individually involved in other groups. It seems that he and I will be facing our own new frontiers shortly, and it is only natural that we learn from how to deal with that journey from Star Trek.

V. Conclusion

Claiming to be crucial mythology of the 20^th century, or any century for that matter, is a bold statement. There are few that would claim such an accomplishment. But it only one accomplishment on the long list that Star Trek has compiled in its 43 year lifespan. There are far more consumers of Star Trek stories than there are readers of the exploits of Hercules or Perseus. It has spread across the globe and invaded every trade from cooking to weapon making. What is it that keeps the fans coming back for more? Ryan seems to think that Star Trek provides “a model for the way things could be, should be,” and that this appeals to many people (Olson, 2009, NP). In a time where the choices for activities and entertainment are so high, Star Trek still captures the attentions of so many perhaps due to this very observation. It isn’t just languages and starships; it’s a way to come together, work together for a real noble purpose: hope. Hope for what Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry called a “kinder, gentler future and one in which people of all types of people from all manners of places live together in harmony. In my mind, any group, folk or not, that attempts to make this a possibility and believes that it will do just that is undertaking a Herculean effort indeed.

Urban Bear: A True Story and How it Functions as My Personal Folklore

The Urban Bear
You know when there is a family story that a relative likes so much that you can just feel when it’s coming on? That is the case with the Urban Bear personal narrative, in which my dad and I witness a full-sized black bear running through downtown Gatlinburg, Tennessee. My dad and I have both told the story many times, but there is one time in particular sticks out to me. It serves to illustrate how my family thinks in a very different way than my mother’s family does and gives some insight into my own personal behavior.

Context
Much of my father’s family is gone so we almost always spend holidays with my mom’s family. Put simply, her parents and four sisters are all crazy. They all have a particularly irritating trait in which they feel that they must always one-up the people they are conversing with. About 10 years ago, for some reason, bears came up while we were around the Christmas tree on the evening of Christmas Eve. I think my mom had mentioned that we had seen them in crossing the road in the Great Smokey Mountain National Park the previous week, and then suddenly my Aunt Dorothy bursts in and to tell some silly story about petting bears in Canada on one of her excursions. Of course, it doesn’t take a miraculous sixth sense to figure out what story is coming next. My father, with a smirk, begins:

Last month the whole family went on a weekend trip to Gatlinburg, Tennessee. We hit some spots in town during the day, but in the evening Ryan (my little brother) had started to not feel well. So, Laura (my mother) and Ryan went back to the hotel and Eric and I decided to do a bit of exploring. There is hardly a destination where we don’t have a little bit of adventure. We thought we hit the jackpot when we found a real old style baseball arcade game. We goofed around with that for awhile, and then went back out into the street. This is the main stretch of town and we were getting a taste of Gatlinburg. Then we started hearing screaming. There were a group of old ladies on a second-floor balcony screaming and pointing. We thought they were yelling “Beer! Do you wanna beer?” We thought those old ladies were nuts and kept on walking. An instant later we realized what they were actually trying to tell us. They were yelling “BEAR!” And, there it was, coming right at us.






















For an instant we were dumbfounded, but then I grabbed Eric and we got under the streetlight so we could see where we were going if we had to run. My plan, if it were to chase us, was to run into the nearby restaurant. At least in there we wouldn’t be the only food it might want. But, the bear turned away after a bus nearly hit it. Then it was in a motel parking lot scaring the tenants. They were running into rooms, into the pool, and on top of their cars. And then the bear narrowly misses another large bus before running off.
A moment later a park ranger was driving by. We flagged him down and frantically told what had happened and which way the bear had gone. He looked at us for only an instant and then said “We’ve got a lot of ‘em around here,” and drove off. We could not have been more shocked.
The next morning, as we were leaving our hotel, we were telling the story to Ryan and Laura. As we were speaking we passed a homeless man that was sitting on the side of the road. He overheard us discussing the bear and said “Those black bears, we got a lot of ‘em around here,” and then walked off. At that moment, we were too shocked to laugh.

Function
The most appropriate function I can identify would be to escape from repressions imposed by society. While not as clear as a Robin Hood tale, I think it displays an experience with an endangered feature of culture that is harder and harder to locate in the current American social status. That is man’s relationship with nature. Sure, anyone can have a day at the zoo and claim to have seen the bears. However, I can say from experience that they have never SEEN a bear until the 300 pound animal is having its daily snack search within a stone’s throw. And how many people can actually claim to have seen such a thing? I lived deep in the Great Smokey Mountains of North Carolina for six years, but it took a freak event like that one to get that close. We found cows in a yard once, but never any bears.
The personal narrative provides my dad and me with some unique cultural capital. Without spending thousands of dollars and flying to the Louvre we were able to witness something truly amazing. For a few moments, we were in the middle of old mountain folklore. We literally faced a beast and lived to tell of it. Because society has moved so far from nature, we are in a dwindling minority.

Meaning
For my dad, he had exactly one meaning in mind when he told this story that day. Through this story he found a rare shot to give an indirect “Up yours” to one of the most annoying people we know. I’m sure he was salivating at the opportunity too.
I have tried to make the most of one of the best stories that I have. My father’s family has lost several members already, and I’d rather not claim most of my mother’s family, leaving me with fewer sources for family folklore. Also, I haven’t yet had the opportunity to fly to Europe or even the west coast of the United States. Many of contemporaries have and now have great stories to tell about it. While I do wish I could make similar trips, I take comfort in the fact that I found a great story and I only had to travel an hour and a half and paid no admission fee.

Esoteric and Exoteric Factors
An esoteric factor that I could point out is the way in which my dad and I compose ourselves in new or unfamiliar places. When we have the opportunity to explore a new place, we go at it head on. We do this separately, but when we are together we tend to pressure ourselves into going the extra mile. This has gotten us into a sticky situation more than once, but more often than not it works out well and we get a good story out of it. I think there two ways that this behavior can be viewed. I think that others, including my mother, see this as a waste of time and energy. She doesn’t see any reason to go into new territory without a map and a travel guide. Also, someone always brings up the argument that we are two males and are just too hardheaded when together to do things the easy way.
However, I see it more as a frontier spirit that we take into every new location. There are few places that you can’t find a map for these days, so you have to make your own adventure out of every stroll through the park or visit to a new city. There are so few original experiences to be had in day to day working life; I don’t understand why more people chose to run their vacations like a board meeting.
My dad could give a pretty long and colorful list of exoteric factors when it comes to my grandparents and aunts. In addition to what we may believe about them, other exoteric factors lie in what we think other groups think about them. And, in a telling fact, outside of the immediate family I don’t think anyone knows my grandparents well enough to forward an opinion. If there is a phone call to their home it is either one of their daughters of their beloved credit union. No one comes over, no one says hi. As far as what my aunts think of my grandparents, one word comes to mind; reverence. They bow down to their word as if it was bellowed from the burning bush itself. Why this occurs is beyond me, but they appear to be the most trusted parents of all time.
This fact, coupled with my grandparents favoritism leaning toward the younger daughters (my mother is the oldest, lucky me) leads to Dorothy being the blabbermouth that she is. She has gone on trips all over the world on a house sitter’s pay? I don’t think so. We can thank granddad for all of these stories that we have to hear every time we are over for the holidays. If she wasn’t the family favorite someone would have told her to shut up by now. But she is and they haven’t. I don’t think she’ll try to bring bears up again though.

Conclusion
There are few ways to get people’s attention that is better than introducing an interstitial concept.
Bears belong in the forest, lumbering along picking bearing and roaring at squirrels. That is where Mr. Bear should be, but that isn’t where we found him. This bear wanted a taste of the city life, and the locals seemed content to let him or her have it. Not only is there a bear in town, but the authorities aren’t concerned? Now the story has them leaning in because they just have to know what happens to Mr. Bear and the brave souls who dared to face him. And I am glad to tell them this story. It isn’t a story of accomplishment, but instead of a unique encounter with a fellow and furry American who doesn’t hold the status that he did in times gone by. Some can say they have shaken hands with American Presidents, but I am not impressed with their tale of interspecies greetings. I’ve been a few picnic baskets away from a bear, and the ranger didn’t seem intent on returning it to the cave.

The Pirate's Tale: A Personal Contribution to Geoffrey Chaucer's "Canterbury Tales" Part 2

The Modern English translation of "The Pirates Tale"

The Pirate’s Prologue

The Host pulled himself from the ditch at once,

“That last tale has made me feel like a dunce.

I will no longer let Wes Craven spin,

A tale that will cause me to vomit again!”

He stood up to hop back on his white horse

And began riding back onto the course.

“So far we have heard a tale of fear here,

As well as an unusual tale of care there.

We have even heard from the ninja guy,

Can one not tell of some fun lest I die?”

Just then a pirate appeared from the crowd,

And slipped a hand inside the stripper’s gown.

“Aye matey, I’ve got the tale for you friend,

For you should role with laughter by the end.

Except for that red-haired girl over there

Who just sings and dances without a care.”

Mind you that this is a pirate for real,

Not like the one’s that Walt Disney did steal.

His outlook on sex is quite deranged,

Perhaps because his trouser snake was quite under-changed.

If you are a fan of a fairy tale

Then you should read what Lance Bass has to tell.

The Pirate’s Tale

Before I begin, perhaps I should say

That this is a tale I learned not today.

It was told me by many folks crying

Thinking that it would prevent them from dieing.

I won’t go into all of that right now

To tell tales of such I’ll Dick Cheney allow.

This story takes place in the old British Isles,

Where white as snow is every single child.

They all tell of a great prince named Whale,

Hence that small nation where I buy my ale.

It is said that his middle name was Ova,

And I am unsure who came up with Ova.

And as we know his last name was Pantsdragon.

Whale Ova Pantsdragon had’em gaggin’.

Whale had a younger brother named Arthur,

Who could look at the girls but go no farther.

The brothers competed in everything,

Arthur was better learning, Whale at flirting.

Neither were very successful with a sword,

Arthur would become immediately bored.

The thrust that concerned Whale wasn’t in combat,

He would spot a maiden and just want to hit that!

If it must be said, Whale is more like me,

And Spock over here is Arthur, you’ll see.

On a sunny May day, a girl appears,

So beautiful she is immune to leers.

The jaws of both boys drop hard causing twinge,

Whale says, “This is why all my girlfriends cringe.”

They both fall for the dear sweet Guinevere,

And they compete more than anything here.

She appeared while they were practice fighting,

Suddenly something in their pants was biting.

Each of them slide their swords around their belts,

To cover the extended front piece of felt.

She giggles at the sight that she caused,

Beauty like hers should be against the laws.

“These boys are such fun, full of gentleness.

Not to mention how well they fill their pants!”

One night, after a walk in her garden

She heard a knock on her door that was ardent.

In the doorway was a shrouded man,

But she could see the royal seal on his hand.

He grabbed her by the waist and kissed her neck

So softly that she returned with a peck.

Her gown began to loosen, hands on her lace,

So engrossed in pleasure, she looked at his face.

{This portion of the manuscript has been lost or destroyed. We apologize to the reader for the inconvenience.}

The castle was immersed in flame and arrows,

The possibility of the king’s escape was narrow.

The reasons for this war is not important,

At least according to my informants.

At the funeral, the next king would rise.

The town pondered, “Which one of these guys?”

There was a sword that has been stuck in a stone,

The boy that takes it from the grave is king alone.

Both boys pulled and pulled, but the blade was still,

Their Guinevere looks on with a thrill.

All left the sight with tears in their eyes,

Guinevere with the same down her thighs.

She paced back and forth in her lonely room

When suddenly she hears a thunderous Boom!

“What could create such a noise as this one?

Has George Bush brought his soldiers for more fun?”

She swung open the door to find Arthur,

With a complex device upon which is the sword,

Still within the stone, and Arthur bare,

Even this heavy sword stopped not his flare.

The sword is placed beside their marriage bed,

Where many Guinevere night tears are shed.

One dawn she screamed aloud and grasped the sword,

Pulling it from the stone, their future assured.

The Pirate's Tale: A Personal Contribution to Geoffrey Chaucer's "Canterbury Tales"

The following is in Middle-English, as Chaucer's original text is. It will be followed by the modern English translation.

The Pirate’s Prologue

The Hoost pulled him-seluen from the dyk at oones,

“That laste tale has mad me feele liche a dunce.

I wil no langer lete Wes Craven spynne,

A tale that wil chesun me to spewe a-gen!”

He stod up to hop bak on his whyte hors

And ginnen ryding bak onto the corse.

“So far we hauen hurde a tale of fere heer,

As wel as an unusual tale of care there.

We hauen euen hurde from the ninja guy,

Can oon not tell of soum fun lest I die?”

Just then a pirate apered from the croude,

And sliped a hand insyde the stripper’s goune.

“Aye matey, I’ve got the tale for you frend,

For you sceold rowl with lahter by the ende.

Nif for that sangwine-haired gurl over there

Who just syngs and huppes missen a care.”

Mynd you that this is a pirate for real,

Not like the oon’s that Walt Disney did stele.

His outlook on sex is quite deranged,

Perhaps bi-cause his trouser worm was quite under-changed.

If you are a fan of a fairye tale

Then you sceolde rede what Lance Bass has to tell.

The Pirate’s Tale

Before I gennin, perhaps I sceold say

That this is a tale I clergial not today.

It was tolde me by manye folks crying

Thinching that it wold skerren them from dieing.

I won’t go innen all of that ryght now

To tell tales of such I’ll Dick Cheney allow.

This story takes stede in the olde British Isles,

Where whyte as snaw is euerich syngle child.

They all tell of a gret pryns named Whale,

Hence that smalle nacioun where I beye my ale.

It is sede that his middel name was Ova,

And I am unsure who came up with Ova.

And as we knowe his last name was Pantsdragon.

Whale Ova Pantsdragon had gyrles gaggin’.

Whale had a gunger broder named Arthur,

Who coold luke at the gyrles but go no farther.

The broders competed in everything,

Arthur was better lettruring, Whale at flirting.

Neither were verrey spedful with a swerde,

Arthur wolde bi-com rightely bored.

The thruste that concerned Whale wasn’t in combat,

He wolde see a mayden and just want to hit that!

If it mun be sede, Whale is more liknen me,

And Spock over here is Arthur, you’ll see.

Onne a sonney May day, a gyrl apeers,

So venust she is immune to leers.

The chavyls of bothe boys drop harde chesuning a twinge,

Whale says, “This is whi all my girlfriends cringe.”

They bothe falle for the duere sweote Guinevere,

And they compete more than ought here.

She apeered while they were telinge medlynge,

Sodeynly sumthyng in their pants was bitynge.

Eche of them slod their swerdes umbe their fettle,

To couren the extended frount pece of felte.

She giggles at the sighte that she caused,

Venust like hers sceold be agenst the laws.

“These boys are siche fun, ful of admodnesse.

Not to mengen how well they fill their pants!”

One niht, after a walke in her gardin

She hurde a bobbe on her dore that was ardent.

In the doorway was a schrouded man,

But she coold see the roial seel on his hand.

He grabbed her by the waste and kysse her nekke

So softley that she returned with a peck.

Her goun began to loosen, hands on her lace,

So engrossed in deyntee, she looked at his face.

{This portion of the manuscript has been lost or destroyed. We apologize to the reader for the inconvenience.}

The castel was immersed in blase and arrows,

The possibility of the kuyng’s ascapie was narwe.

The resuns for this war is not important,

At leste according to my enformants.

At the funeral, the next kyng woold ryse.

The towne mused, “Which oon of these guys?”

There was a swerde that has ben stuk in a stoon,

The boy that takes it from the burien is kyng al-lone.

Bothe boys plyghted and plyghted, but the spire was still,

Their Guinevere luke on with a thrill.

All lefte the site with teres in their eyes,

Guinevere with the same doun her thighs.

She paced bak and forth in her elenge roum

When sodeynly she heers a thunderus Boom!

“What coold creat siche a knap as this oon?

Has George Bush broght his sowdyers for more fun?”

She swung open the door to fynd Arthur,

With a complex engyn upon which is the swerde,

Still binne the stoon, and Arthur bare,

Effnen this heuy swerde stopped not his flare.

The swerde is stallit beside their mariage bedde,

Wher manye Guinevere nyght tears are sched.

One dawn she screemed aloud and grasped the swerde,

Pulling it fram the stoon, their fuchure assured.